and that was a date

i went on a date last night. i don't know if it's him or the fact that i feel temporary here or that my mind is somewhere else, but i just wasn't into. he's nice, which is something. and he seems to be really into me, so that's nice, but all i can say about him is nice. i feel nothing. no spark. no butterflies, at all. none. not even a little mothlike one. nothing. he asked me out again. i don't really have time next week, i'm trying to plan a ladies night and want to see nicki and morrissey and bradley reunion. excuses, excuses, just not feeling it. my mind/heart, still with pk and that sounds so fucking pathetic. it's not like i think about him all the time, but that's who my mind goes to in my sleep, who i try to be in when i dream.

i had a dream last night that i was hanging out with andy, from austin. i was showing him my engagement ring and wedding band. it was this super nice antique ring. want to get married much? not so much that i'm going to pretend.

i have all these plans tonight. it's betty's birthday and young widows are at the beat kitchen. i'm going to watch lost, eat some chocolate, walk the dog, and go out more tonight than i have in the past couple of weeks.

i. am. lame.