Hours later, a little more calm. You kind of take it for granted, the fact that the being that you see every day, that you sleep with every night, that you plan your life around, will just be around forever. More than once this evening I got off the couch and expect to see her on her bed or sitting next to the couch. But no, empty bed, empty floor. I kept looking at the clock planning her next walk. Instead, I sit in my bed surrounded by cats who are more than happy to have a dog-free house.
It might not be cancer. It looks very much like cancer but they haven't actually tested the mass, they do that tomorrow at the oncologist when they do the in depth ultrasound. Until then, it just looks like cancer, and pneumonia and an inflamed esophagus, and an unknown mass near her heart with elevated white blood cells and depleted platelets. Until then, it looks bad but looks can be deceiving. Since there were no masses in her lungs if it is cancer we can hopefully do treatment.
She's only six. I should have many more years with her. I better have many more years with her.
It might not be cancer. It looks very much like cancer but they haven't actually tested the mass, they do that tomorrow at the oncologist when they do the in depth ultrasound. Until then, it just looks like cancer, and pneumonia and an inflamed esophagus, and an unknown mass near her heart with elevated white blood cells and depleted platelets. Until then, it looks bad but looks can be deceiving. Since there were no masses in her lungs if it is cancer we can hopefully do treatment.
She's only six. I should have many more years with her. I better have many more years with her.
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